B.O.B. (Bullets Over Blogland)

As seen here, here and often here, bullets are all the rage.

I can't get my act together. I'm twelve days behind in the 365 project. I have dozens of personal e-mails that need to be composed. I have to write for MBT. I'm sick. It's just a chest cold/throat thing. I must comment on your site. Gah! Please, please forgive my lack of blather commenting. I've been reading through bloglines and google reader so I know how far behind I am. I figure most of you have given up on me, as you should. But the love! I have so much love for you all. I should install an official slacker seal. You don't even want to see the sorry state of my house.

You may ask, "What have you been doing?" That is a really good question. I don't have time to ponder that and I have absolutely no idea. I guess I spend my time going through the motions of every day life and exerting an insane amount of energy on feeling guilty for not being able to keep up my online life.

Strawberry had a birthday. She's four! I seem to be struggling with this. Up to eighteen months is an infant and then comes the tantrum filled years but at four she has moved beyond that. Four seems so grown up. The changes in appearance and behavior, the quick grasp of knowledge, the ability to reason, the range of emotions and the fragileness that comes with all of this is overpowering. We had a birthday party for her at Nana's house. Strawberry requested a Happy Feet birthday cake. While her guests played outside, she wanted to do a new puzzle on the dining room table. Her little sister slept in the living room. It was the most fun I've had in a long time.

I also had an extreme amount of fun with Metro Mama when we went to Evil Dead: The Musical. I couldn't stop smiling! If you get the chance to see it… Go! You can check out Metro Mama's recap of the night.

Two days earlier, I took the girls to a musical of their own - Go Diego Go! It was Buttercup's first time at one of these children events. She couldn't understand why there was an intermission and cried for Diego to come back for the whole twenty minutes. We're still singing "We're gonna get your growl back" around the house.

I'm off to the airport for a trip out west and I've run out of time. I'm scared of mosquitos... Later!

Pop Quiz

What is the best way to get over feeling like a frump?
a) Get a new hair cut
b) Buy some new jeans
c) Accessorize
d) Receive a compliment
e) Do 100 abdominal crunches

Where is the best place to get picked up?
a) Seducing a stranger with bedroom eyes in a night club
b) While gently squeezing tomatoes at the super market
c) Picking up your child from daycare
d) In an aisle at your nationwide department store
e) Sipping an overpriced frothy latte at a café

Find the answers here!


Bonus questions!
1. Where do you find that people are the most approachable?
2. Do you have any memorable pick up lines that you care to share?

Soccer Monster

I might have mentioned this story to a few people on the weekend but nothing beats a full and complete confession that is written in a public forum.

For Strawberry's birthday we got her the Mini Dora Soccer Pop-up Goal. It's actually a pretty cool idea. It comes complete with ball, pump and of course the net. Everything is there to keep your child running around and busy right out of the box.

The night before I wanted to pump up the soccer ball and put it next to her so she saw it when she woke up. She's been raving about Soccer Monsters and her super soccer kick for a while now so I thought this was the perfect way to start her birthday.

The ball was this neat little yellow neoprene stitched thing that looked like a real soccer ball. The Dora and Boots decorated ball was Size 2 for little feet. It came with its own tiny pump and inflator needle. Yes, the ones you always lose and end up rummaging through the garage looking for. However I had a bigger pump that would take care of filling up the ball much faster. I did actually think about using the Air Compressor but thought that was overkill. So I pumped it up nice and firm and tucked it away for later.

The only problem was… Daddy over inflated it! The actual stitching and the neoprene ripped and the inner liner blew apart big enough to stick my foot into it. There goes half the present! I was actually ashamed to tell Jana but she just shrugged it off. What can you do? Hide the blown apart evidence and give the net to the girl and no ones’ the wiser.

Until this morning… I was confronted by Strawberry with the carcass of the Soccer Ball.

"Daddy… it blowed up!"

Does anyone know a good sports store that sells Size 2 Soccer balls? You know… for little feet. Otherwise Buttercup wants to use the net as a tent.

Overcast

It's a gray dreary day. Clouds have crept into my mind. Words feel larger than I could possibly comprehend. Life, love, pain and happiness are beyond my grasp of understanding. I feel limited in my own skin. How I wish that I could be someone else for a short while. To know what those words mean in other situations with other people. I am enchanted by strangers. Everything that I know is not enough. I want more. I want different. Don't get me wrong. I am happy being me. I have a fairly easy, good life but this is a fascination that I know I cannot satisfy. To see the world through new eyes would be an astounding discovery. On days like this I feel trapped and incomplete. My only escape is to dream. Crawl under the duvet and wake up tomorrow when the sun comes out.

Say What?

Upon looking at a half moon, my future astronaut worries, "The moon is broken."

At daycare, the caregiver tells me, "When we were out on our walk, Strawberry pointed out Madonna on an H&M billboard. How does she know who Madonna is?" One of the preschoolers in her group answered for me. "She lives with them."

The family was gathered in front of the television. We saw this commercial for the first time. Awestruck by it, we doubled over when Buttercup followed with her rendition of dancing and singing Boom Chicka Wah Wah. Colin's face was priceless! The fun the girls will have in torturing their dad has already begun.






123's & ABC's Dude! from something blue on Vimeo

Real dudes do memes.
Thanks L.A. Daddy and Misterpie (well of course the Kitten was behind that one.) We are hoping Buttercup's "Hey Dude" will inspire a few more guys to jump on this wagon. You know you want to!

Dude Meme

Ok… I’m going to try something that hasn’t been attempted yet. Well… nothing I’ve seen online anyways. I know the number of guys who write on their wives blogs are few and far between. I want to coax them out a little and see if they would do a guy/hubby meme. It’s painless and should only take a few minutes. I'm not going to ask the typical questions. (Boxers or Briefs) If the guys aren’t into it then the Mommy Bloggers can answer it for them OR do it themselves. (Just be sure to specify who is doing the talking.)

What was your first car and what about it made it so great? (Do I bother asking what their dream car is?)
My first car was a used 1983 AMC Spirit GT. It came with a torque filled 4.2 inline six and a Borg Warner 5 speed transmission. (same as the 5.0 Mustangs) When I first bought it I didn’t have a clue how to drive stick. It took me a day to get it out of the driveway and halfway down the block. I finally gave up and my Dad had to park it for me. When I did learn how to work the clutch it was hard to drive because it didn’t have power steering till after I installed it. Imagine white knuckling the steering wheel praying you downshifted to the proper gear at the end of the turn. AMC’s were cheap but decent. I learned how to fix cars on that little two door. Bloodied knuckles and lessons learned. It’s too bad I drove the $#@% out of it.

I can’t think of anything specific that would be my ‘dream car’. There is too many to pick from. I do know it would probably be something from the late ‘60s and probably Mopar. One of those Plumb Crazy or wild and bright colours they used to have.

Saying something like the new Porsche Cayman S would be way too easy.

What is the most played song on your iTunes / WMP or whatever you are listening to music on your computer with? And… Name five bands that made a big impression on you but never made it big on the charts.
Brassy – Work It Out from the Got It Made CD. Played 14 times on iTunes. The girls love this song.
And five bands… I will have to be careful not to pick any that Jana has listed with her Top 100 list. (thankfully she still has only done the first 20)
- Dig. One of those bands Jana surprised me with and that I couldn't stop listening to.
- Seaweed. I don't remember how i stumbled on these guys but they are one of the few bands i haven't see live that I was really into.
- Toadies. Simple straight forward rock. The Rubberneck CD is great start to finish.
- Doves. One of the most melodic bands from the UK but not quite BritPop. I am amazed they never broke bigger than they did. They are brilliant live. I've lost count how many times I've seen them.
- Summercamp. One of those bands that you would have loved to hear what their second CD might have sounded like. Their first and only full album was so much more than 'Drawer', their minor hit.

Do you know what end of the hammer to hold? What was your last project around the house?
I hold the stick end and hit my thumb with the heavy end. My last project is still ongoing. Our bathroom is in drastic need of finishing but I can’t square up the back wall. (the window doesn’t have a proper header or sill plate) I have to remove the tub to retrieve my wedding band before anything more happens. It fell behind one bath night. Once we save up little extra money or get our taxes back I’m hiring someone to do the tile for us and it will be easy to wrap up once that is out of the way.

What is your best method for avoiding chick flicks?
I don’t really have to avoid them. With two little ones who has time for a movie? Usually I always groan when Jana comes home with a DVD rental. But they aren’t all bad chick flicks. They just have poor titles as if they were bad chick flicks. I have a bad habit of pegging a movie a chick flick if its not your typical Dude film.

Who’s more of the techno geek in your house? This can apply to tools, toys, gadgets, geeking at home on the computer or anything else that might apply.
Jana would argue that I’m the only tool in the house. But she can geek out pretty large with her blog and flickr account. She’s the reason I have a page up on Facebook. She filled it all out for me and passed on the addiction. I was geeking with the iPod not too long ago but I’m starting to get a headache from picking and choosing what will fit on the damn thing. I am the one who will tinker and attempt to fix something around the house when it needs it.

What are three things that are a part of your life that you would never see your own dad doing?
-I can never see my dad biking it to work. Something I'm really enjoying right now.
- Wasting time online doing stuff like this or tooling around on jeep websites. I guess I should add 'writing occasionally' to the list.
-And lastly I don't see him losing any portion of his hearing because of loud music or clubs / concerts / etc...

What’s the last “Dude! I just got a _______ from _______” thing that you really didn’t need but bought anyways?
Dude! I just got a 5 Gallon Air Compressor with the Impact Gun and Air Ratchet from Crappy Tire. I used to have full access to a full garage after hours and I miss the lift, the air tools and all the other things I would never own but need when you are too cheap to pay someone else to fix your car for you. I really didn’t need it but the price was kickass but when the fuel pump went on my VW TDI it was way too complicated of a job to do in your own garage. Yet I still went out and bought the Impact Sockets for it when they went on sale. I needed this when I had the old AMC Spirit.

What is the wildest / craziest / dangerous etc… thing you have gotten away with? This can (or should) involve the Cops. Common guys, this is your chance to really brag!
It was around 4am and three guys in the ’69 olds. The famous last words were… “What will this puppy do?” Picture my foot coming down like a thousand pound lead weight. We were driving north on Bathurst and I saw the light turn green ahead of me at College. There was plenty of room to make a high speed run. The only problem I didn’t forsee was the Cop sitting at the red light on College who watched me blow through the intersection full bore! I backed off then and it took the Cop a good three blocks to catch up with me, lights flashing. I pulled over and I have never been told to get out of the car before by an Officer. He was pissed! He asked me if I knew how fast I was going and I wasn’t about to self incriminate so I said… No clue! (I did glance down at the speedo and it was reading the high side of 80Mph) He ranted for a little bit and my friends thought I was done for. They thought I was going to jail. He wrote me a ticket for 99Kmh in a 50 Zone. I believe this was the maximum amount without taking my licence then and there. He instructed me to go home and 'Park it'. Not so bad considering. Six demerits and a $350.00 fine. I consulted an Ex-Cop from Points and he said as long as he didn’t have me on radar or any other hard evidence against me he really had no proof. I got all dolled up for my court appearance and I was ready for the confrontation. As long as I never said anything about my true speed I was scott free. The Cop never showed.

It’s not a dude meme if it doesn’t include something regarding the opposite sex. When was the last time you experienced a true head turner? Where you couldn’t help but take that second glance at someone. Remember to be creative in your response. It will get you in less trouble.
This one is easy. I was at Crappy Tire on Sunday and I was walking past the magazine rack. There she was… Halle Berry on the cover of Esquire Magazine. It’s a simple B&W photo of her in little black brazillian panties and a matching tight bodice. I’ll admit that Halle is a beautiful woman but she’s never clubbed me over the head like this before. I don’t know if it’s because of what she is wearing or what got to me… Even tho I was tempted I did manage to leave the store without buying the issue.

OK. That's it. I would like to tag Misterpie, McH, C who's making sure The Kids Are Alright, Dave Handbasket and L.A. Daddy. Anyone is welcome to join in. Give us a heads up and we will link back to you.

Mind, Body and Soul

I usually start each month thinking about my friends in the 'puter. Reminiscing about the things I have recently read. Sometimes a special post lingers with me and it will be the one that I choose to recognize. Other times, I'll go back and reread many words in search of finding just the right one. It is always something that moves me. No doubt there are many exceptional posts to choose from.

Yet there is something special about sharing a post that you know others haven't yet seen. A post that cries out to be read. This month I am awarding a brilliant gem of a friend that I am glad is still a bit of a secret from the mainstream blogworld. It's kind of like when I was sent the debut Coldplay album almost a year before it was released in North America. She's cool like that! She's talented like that!

In The Shape of Three, Kittenpie honours her daughter's third birthday by sharing with us the power held in that particular number. I agree that it is completely magical and as we round up Strawberry's third year this month, I know a few of the wondrous moments that are theirs to discover.

Colin carried around a mitsu tomoe symbol in his wallet for years before finally getting it tattooed on his leg. It made it even more significant to him when his two younger brothers later went out and got similar tattoos. (I like the way I made Colin's leg look smaller than my arms by squishing this photo. Bwahaha.)

I was aware of some of the mysterious facts surrounding the number three but when I read Kittenpie's words it all came together wrapped in a beautiful bow. Now I know why I have long held this number so close to my heart and it makes me want to hug Kittenpie. The thing that might make this award even more special is that it is her third perfect post! Coincidence? I think not!

Of course you can find the perfect round up for April by visiting MommaK and Lindsay.