shhh... That's a dirty word
I have the latest, trendy accessory. You know what I'm talking about. The coolest celebrities think it’s all the rage. Why of course, Babies. So why the hell is Mommy such a dirty word?
I first discovered the Mom versus Mommy War over at Motherhood Uncensored. Soon followed this, this and this. It was Her Bad Mother that got the greasy wheels in my mind rolling.
I originally thought that the reason why Mommy Blogs were being looked down upon were because non-parents found the genre self indulgent and boring. You probably remember that woman that you didn’t know so well, maybe through a friend or at work. She tediously recounted pieces of her child’s daily activities like it was the best thing since sliced bread. You felt it was polite to listen but all you heard was blah blah blah, Ethan, blah blah blah so cute… You couldn’t wait to run to your closest friend and tell her what a dreary knob so-and-so was and then spill the beans about who was doing who, what you found on sale and complain that your boss didn’t know his way out of his own ass.
I totally understand why a childless person would find something labeled a Mommy, Mom or Parent Blog to not be their cup of tea, even though I’m sure that you know that these blogs are filled with all kinds of amusing topics. It just so happens that we share a common bond. There is a little creature that makes us beam.
Yes, being a Mom is one of the things that defines me. However I clearly remember That Woman and I refuse to be labeled dreary knob. In my rare social encounters, I try to discuss things I’ve read, music that needs to be heard, stuff in the news and maybe some celebrity gossip. Even though I don’t think I’ve overtly bored anyone with poop stories, invitations are less frequent. This is partly due to the fact that people know I have children to rear. Not to mention that after the age of thirty, people with or without children, tend to switch to being homebodies.
I needed an outlet to discuss Mommy issues and I found this wonderful world on the web. Smart and funny people that understand and share delightful stories that make me laugh and cry. It couldn’t be here that this war was raging?!
Maybe it’s because blogrolls mainly refer to our category as Mommy that the women who have outgrown this label are miffed. It does seem to be the age of our children that determine our titles. My oldest calls me Mommy and my youngest calls me Dada (She’s eight months old. Everything is Dada.)
Then again maybe some Moms feel that people who refer to themselves as Mommies are degrading their genre. I don't see how this could possibly be true. It takes only a couple minutes of reading a newly discovered blog to see if that person’s writing style is something that you want to return to. Personally, I have to stop surfing because there are too many incredible women writing blogs that I’ve become addicted to. Soon I won't have time to create precious, blogworthy moments with my own children.
If we want respect for Mom/Mommy/Parent/PWC (People With Children) Blogs we need to end the war. Peace out.
11 Singing the blues:
That whole thing is just crazy. We shouldn't be judged about what we write on our blogs. People out there write about all sorts of topics.
We don't have to be categorized as a mommy blog. It is just our blog and we just happen to be moms. End of story.
And if people that don't like it and don't want to read, then so be it. But having a category, on the other hand, gets you more readers, and new friends that have similar interests.
Wooo, sorry for the rant :)
I'm witchu dawg. I think the rest of the world is just hatin' because it's easier to deal with their envy that way. I remember ebing childless and single and wanting only to find Mr Right and start a family. Other people's stories would only exasperate that feeling.
Now that we are having children in our 30s and up, we have had more time to develop our tastes and our sense of selves. We are more selfish than our parents, who were more willing to sacrifice themselves and their identities for the sake of the children. We know ourselves better by the time we do get around to having babies. The last thing we want to do is lose our street cred after all that investment.
ANYTHING someone is deeply into can be a huge bore for other people. When Ada was weeks old we went to lunch with some people I know through my college. I worked very hard not to talk about her unless they asked, but one of the women talked ENDLESSLY about her motorcycle - what was wrong with it, how she figured out what to fix, the noises it makes, blah blah blah. I am sure she thinks my chatter is boring too.
I agree 100%...the war is crazy!
I have been reading some feminist that are hard core and I am in awe of their determination to degrade the stay at home mom. I always considered myself a feminist because I thought it was about choice and respect.
I am a proud mommy!
Well said! Personally, I'd love to be called Mommy, or Mama, or Mom. Chicky Baby calls me "Dada" as well!
Great post and great blog. This "war" couldn't be more ridiculous. I am a newbie blogger and was blown to discover all the smart, funny, talented mom-writers out there. Like you, I need to stop surfing or I'll require some sort of a 12 step program soon :)
Nicely done. And here here! I'm still waiting to be called MOMMY... I'm MAMA or YOU.
Well said. We all rock, no matter what we call ourselves, no matter what our chilluns call us, no matter WHAT.
Peace out.
Here's the thing: some of the best writers, the funniest women, the most thought provoking things are written by moms. It used to be that the genre of writing was held by white men. Now that their territory is usurped, it's got to have some whack ass label on it.
My two cents surprised even me there.
It's true, I think of my blog as my personal space, and while I sometimes talk about my girl, I also talk about other things, as do many of the great, funny, interesting moms I read. And there are so many, I find new ones every day. Like you!
God..I've been so busy doing design stuff lately I haven't read most of my fave blogs all week. And look what I missed! I'll link my "What's with All the Hate?" post to this.
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