Butt, of course
Tonight, while peeling potatoes, Colin and I had a thought provoking conversation. All the greatest moments in our relationship have been in the kitchen, preparing potatoes, but I'll save that for another time.
C - "Have you seen the back of that magazine? It's porn!"
J - "That's not pornography. Porn is nude and cheesy. I would say that's more erotic."
C - "Really? Hmmm... I like it."
This was the advertisement we were discussing:
Oh my goodness, even when I was sixteen, my butt did not look like this! I've always known Colin was a butt man. There's been times out shopping where he cannot hide his fondness for my behind, constantly giving me a grab. This is pretty remarkable being that he used to be so afraid of public displays of affection that it took him years before he would hold my hand. He's gotten so bold that he slapped my friends tush thinking it was me. Boy was he embarrassed.
My butt looks more like Jennifer Lopez's. That is if she skipped her daily workouts in favor of marathon video game sessions, while munching on truckloads of Krispy Kreme Donuts. How could he possibly like me, if he likes that? I suppose this wasn't a good conversation for us to have while I'm hormonal and feeling blob-like. Winter hibernation has caused me to put on a few pounds instead of losing the extra baby weight.
I think I'll start The Blog Diet. This is spending every spare second I have reading all the other one million and one posts, instead of running to the kitchen for a slice of that birthday cake that's still in the fridge. Well maybe after the cake is gone.
4 Singing the blues:
Thank goodness my guy is a boob man. I've got boobs-a-plenty. I also have ass-a-plenty, which is why I would not be quite so appealing to an ass man.
Bigger can be better. So many guys prefer them round. It's something to grab on to. I thought I should move to NYC after a business trip. I had never got so much attention in my life!
After reading my post, hubby tried to "kiss my butt" by saying "Oh no, baby it's not the girl that I find attractive. It's the suggestion of the hand grabbing her undies."
Good God woman... what kind of magazines have ads like that on the back of them?! I'm not a prude, but thinking of that sitting on my coffee table made me blush. Then again, I do live in Puritan New England!
...and maybe, just maybe, I'm a little jealous that I don't have one that looks like that! :)
It was the latest issue of Vice and the ad is for American Apparel. I should have put those links in earlier.
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