Big gulp of air - Aaah, whooo...

Another day goes by and then another. This blog sits dormant and dusty. Without advertising pressure, (poof - gone!) I leave the sad, vague words that I'd rather push to the back of my mind and further down from the top, garnering the stray hits that visit. Hi there! Thanks for coming by. Oh look... a new post! Finally.

So here goes nothing, but wait something. Strawberry turned six. The age for me that held some of my most defining moments. Six! A year that brought the first time for sitting at desks and what was then a rite of passage, chickenpox. The year my teacher gave me two gold stars for cleverly handing in a page in my workbook "This is a picture of _______" and I filled in Nothing. Lesson learned: Be creative in finding ways to get out of doing work and you will be rewarded grandly!

Poor Strawberry came down with the flu before her big day, missed school and didn't even want to lick the icing off her cupcake.

Strawberry, I hope that you hold many memories close to your heart from this momentous year. Times of giggles, pure fun and magical ideas.

I made a huge batch of rainbow sprinkled cupcakes to take to daycare for her celebration. They ended up being tasty treats for the office. A few days later I went round two with the cupcakes and made more colourful sweets.

When I am not avoiding writing obscure nonsense to post here, I spend my free time doing my new favourite thing. Blip-blip blipty blipping, now new and improved with videos too!

My addictive personality and me are hook, line and sunk with this obsession. Be a DJ! So many songs, so little time... Sing along. Come and dance or wallow with me. I bounce all over the map depending on my many moods. My ramblings there are lyrics that I fancy from the songs that catch my heart. My station is updated way more frequently with beats and lush harmonies. It's so much easier to express myself with other people's music.

Return to sender

Words are not my friend. Sleep is not my friend. It seems I find myself giving comfort to those who I think might need it yet I feel empty. Dried up. I am but a shell of who I once was. I used to like her but times got tough and I went MIA. There are days that I'll make a brief appearance but then gone again. All that's left is an unknown girl hiding behind this half smile and glossed over eyes. Do they see it? How transparent am I? Shake it off. Things will get worse. Oh good, something to look forward to…

I am searching for hope in faraway wishes. It’s a waste of concentration on energy that could be better spent. I long for a little piece of myself to return so that I can escape. Down. down. drowned.

Pudding

Tonight I sit at the old desktop because the laptop is afflicted with viruses. Much like my life.

I’m surrounded by clutter. I wish nothing more than to dispose of it all. I am not clinging to any sentimental attachment. Much like my life.

These words make their way onto my computer screen and I suppose they come across as dismal but that is not the page that I am on.

I have come to feel like powder. I am reduced to sugar crystals being poured into boiling water. At first I felt like I was dissolving into nothing but then I made the realization that I am evolving.

Perfect songs fill my headphones. It’s late and the music is loud. I keep feeling the presence of someone walking towards me but I am alone with the children sleeping in the next room.

I flip from window to window. I am trying not to read into everything and failing. If it is hard for me to make heads or tails, how can I expect someone removed to understand? Right now there is comfort in the open-ended questions. I think I have what I need and I will take it.

The song will play again. The clutter will dissipate. I will be anew.

a Pisces takes her Valentine's toes to the ocean

Wordless Wednesday
More Wordless Wednesday Participants

In the clouds

The small oval window holds my interest. I am absorbed.
The world is cold… frozen. The sky is empty.
Below there are vast squares and circles in shades of earth brown.
I long for another helping of clouds to admire.
Their softness spreads a blanket of sweetness and comfort.
Entranced by white fluffy mounds with peaks of blue like cotton candy meringue.
Consumed with the grand idea of jumping onto the pillow to rest my head on a cloud. The reality of falling through removed. The clouds are safe.
I dream in the pink glow from the west.
The sun slips away.
Descending into opaque darkness.
Home.

Take my heart & wrap it in a ribbon & a bow

Christmas is about bringing happiness. 

2008 will now be known as the year that Bratz dolls invaded our home.

I'm in denial so I'll be calling them rock and roll dolls. All that matters is that we have some very happy, little girls, going from toy to toy while singing songs about Rudolf, bells and mistletoe. 

The warmth of the season has filled my heart and I'll be spending the day thinking about friends and family that I don't get to see today. I'm looking forward to 2009 and the time that will bring us together. 

Drunk blogging

I found beauty in the tossed out brown, 70's couch, missing cushions, that was strewn across the sidewalk.

I looked across the street and smiled at the cheesy snowman lights that brightly lit up the second floor window.

I followed the giddy couple walking hand in hand in front of me.

The cold, night air nipped at my cheeks.

I quickly rushed home after one too many pints.

The conversation fresh in my mind with some of the bestest friends one could ever ask for.

'Tis the season!