Why Can't All Shopping Be Done Online?

This weekend I went to the most dreaded store of stores. Oh, Mirror, Mirror, On The Wall. Where is the worst store of them all? Why of course, it is Walmart. In particular, the one store that is located closest to us. It always appears that this location has been hit by a whirlwind of crazed shoppers. The isles are littered with discarded items while barbaric customers make their way through the mess with no employee in sight. The line-ups at the cash registers are miles long. No one smiles. The cashiers hate their jobs and the customers are on a hunt and destroy mission.

Every time it is a horrible shopping experience and yet I'm a sucker for punishment. It is against my own will that I force myself to enter their doors. I had those cheezoid photos to pick up and thought while I'm there I might as well take advantage of their roll back prices to get a few items. So began the mission. I avoided the other customers with great care, maneuvering my cart away from the piles of items that lay discarded on the floor. I found enough items to satisfy this trip into no man zone. I waited patiently at the check out. The people in front of me were even polite! It was a magical moment. I thought I might escape unscathed.

That was until the stuffed monkey I was purchasing as a gift was rejected by the cashier. She mumbles something about there not being a price tag or bar code and glares at me for bringing this offending item to her line. I told her that it was the only one. Huffily she picks up her phone and announces on the store intercom for the toy department to call her back. She refuses to wait, as we both know that no one actually works in the store. I am forced to pay for all the other items. To continue the masquerade, she gets back on the loud speakers and repeats her call. The next customer's items are rung up. A lone employee walks along gathering up store carts. The cashier asks her if she will help find the monkey price. The cart girl blatantly refuses and tells her to page Diego. The third distress call rings out.

I might add that the monkey might be in the range of five dollars. I wait on the side with my paid for items, slightly amused at the scene playing out. Another customer's items are rung up. There is no sign of Diego. Cart girl saunters by again. The cashier is feeling the weight of my stare and pleads for cart girl to take the monkey to find a price. Reluctantly she agrees and slooooowwly walks away. I watch as two women chat and ignore two children that are acting up. A girl around the age of ten is attempting to push a keypad in the closed cash register area next to them. I give her a look and that warns her what she is doing is wrong and she guiltily looks at the floor. Her younger brother whines.

I no longer feel like this is a worthy way to spend my time. I tell the cashier that this is taking too long but she says that her manager is looking into it. Cart girl is the manager!? Yet another customer makes their way out of the store. The cashier echoes another request on the loud speakers.

Finally her phone rings! More mumbles. I swear she has held the same look of disinterest on her face this whole time. She hangs up her phone and tells me that this is the last item and there is no price so therefore there is nothing she can do. I am in shock!

"So you're telling me that it's not for sale because there is no price tag on it?"

She deadpans a yes in my direction and I am dismissed. They should be giving me the damn five dollar monkey for free with a sincere apology. To wait for that would mean I would never see my children graduate from high school.

I walk away angry with myself for investing that much time into a losing battle. The worst store in the land lives up to their name. As I exit I become crazy shopper and declare to anyone within earshot that I am never shopping there again! Take that Walmart!

I got home and pulled the photos out to show Colin and we discover there is a flaw in the pictures, a scratch in the photo in the exact spot on Every. Single. Print. It is hard to see here but trust me that it is obvious when you hold the photo in your hands.

The scratch must be in this print so IF they agree to reprint the package, I think I should chose a different pose. Which one do you like better?

Alternate One - Sitting outside in the snow.

Or alternate two. Starry night (which strangely looks like the picture of the girls was cut out and imposed on the back drop.)

God help me. I'm going back in...